Balancing Val

Cruise Confession

Posted on: October 24, 2010

I was going to wait until I processed some thoughts or ‘got over it’ but the truth is right now . . .

I Feel Awful

I didn’t make my goal .

My clothes are really tight.

I feel heavy.

I overate more often then not.

I am contemplating dieting again.

I don’t feel like I deserve to eat for a week.

. . . . I know I shouldn’t feel these things and that I shouldn’t beat myself up. But, I cant deny that I’m upset at myself. I thought I was SO far ahead in the game. At least enough that I would be able to handle myself and not feel like less of a person because I am carrying extra weight, or because I overate and drank or because I didn’t look great in a bathing suit.

There is more to the story of course but I didn’t want to deny what was going on right now by completely ignoring it.

I clearly have much more work to do then I thought.

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8 Responses to "Cruise Confession"

Don’t beat yourself up! How often do you get to go on a vacation, let alone a cruise where appetizing food is staring you in the face nonstop!? We all have to allow ourselves times to be comfortable with indulging and a cruise is definitely one of those times. Now that you’re home and in your environment, you can get back on the track that you are used to!

πŸ™‚

Looking back, I was WAY out of my environment so your right, I can’t expect to do the same things. A lot of this crap is more in my head then in my body.

I need to drink water STAT!

Aww hon. /Hug

It is a process. You’ll take some steps forward and some steps back. The big thing is what you do next.

(All big talk since I haven’t been on a travel vacation in a really long time so I’m kinda armchair quarterbacking right now.)

I would, if you can, sit with your feelings for 15 minutes. Yep, I’m recommending Christie’s 15 minutes method: http://www.honormyhealth.com/2010/04/06/how-to-deal-with-emotional-eating-the-15-minute-method/ and then start taking care of yourself. Drink water, get a massage/manipedi/take a bath/sit and watch your favorite guilty pleasure tv show and then the next time you are hungry follow your hunger cues.

If all else fails just keep in mind that if you had dieted before going on the cruise you’ll probably have eaten more than you did.

First, I’m sorry it’s sending your comments to my spam box. I think it randomly chooses someone to spam for a week.

Anyway, you are right. I really gotta make an attempt to sit down and figure out what it is going on in that thought tornado. It’s incredibly hard to take care of myself even BETTER because you treated yourself bad, but i’m going to attempt to do it.

And yes dieting before would have made things WORSE!

Thanks for your support, Kate xoxo πŸ™‚

I know how you feel, but it’s not worth it. I mean dieting is fine- but I think that making goals like,

– drinking more water
– eating lots of veggies
– cutting down on salt
– getting an extra workout in
– doing some meditiation to combat negative thinking

are better ways to approach this. Did you have a good time?? If so, then just go with it! Your body will bounce back in a few days. You didn’t just go and blow everything! I think most of this is in your head. Try and be nice to yourself, and talk to your body like you would talk to a friend’s. We’re so hard on ourselves!!

I did have a great time πŸ™‚

I know my body is going to bounce back eventually, but the way I feel right now, coupled with looking at pictures makes me feel like garbage. I just didn’t want to ignore that feeling and pretend it didn’t happen by not posting.

Excellent mini goals πŸ˜€

You know what…I am going to say something that may or may not work…but it works for me.

GIVE YOURSELF FULL PERMISSION. if you want to wallow in what you didn’t do right, what you totally enjoyed, if you want to diet, if you hate your body, if you want to start making more concious food choices.

Whatever you do, do it with full intent.

What I will guess is that the moment that you sit down and give yourself FULL undivided persmission to rip yourself apart..you’ll stop..move on…and sort it all out. It’s the bouncing between deep self-hate/dissapointment/guilt for thinking of it/positive self-talk that we sometimes get stuck.

Do dieting with full permission..undivided..FULL permission–if you want to do it after that..then go for it.

I know what when I am in those moments, the moment that I give myself FULL permission is usually the moment when I sort out what I really want.

I wanted to thank you for this comment, my friend. It gave me a virtual kick in the butt.

When i thought of giving myself full permission to diet and feel bad for myself, I didn’t WANT to. So if I don’t truly want to feel like that, then I shouldn’t because it’s not doing me any good.

Xoxo

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    • Ayla: My easiest dinner recipe? PB + banana sandwich. Takes 2 minutes which makes me a very happy girl.
    • kristisn: Yum! That looks like a great dinner.
    • Kate D: After two scarring experiences stuck in big city rush hour traffic (facing the wrong direction) while on vacation with my parents I totally understand

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